Our World!

I have set down so many times this week to blog but then Hudson will start crying or Jagger needs something..It just hasn't been in my favor. I am excited that I have a few minutes to sit down. I love to blog so much and I know one day I will get to the point I can everyday but right now I will take the kids crying and wanting stuff...Time flies so fast!
I have alot I want to get out and I really don't even know where to start! I guess I will start with last night! Matthew and I were so excited because at 8:30 both boys were asleep and we were pumped because we  could actually watch Duck Dynasty without being inturrpted! That does not happen much! There have been times it has taken a full week to watch one movie because we have to start and stop it! So many of you understand how exciting it is to watch a show or movie straight through! ;) Anyways..I sit down to look through facebook before the show started! WRONG thing to do! My whole news feeds was  bad, bad, and bad! Everyone was sharing and posting stories of horrible things. West Nile in Mosquitoes, Man with HIV sleeping with all these people, Woman with baby that was shot in the stroller, kids being abducted, sex trafficking, babies being molested, stupid Miley Cyrus, and so much more! By the time I got done (which I didn't even finish looking at everything) I was sick to my stomach and crying! I have figured out I really like living in my "Megan Bubble" where I am unaware of whats going on in the world but I know that is not how life needs to be either. I know there is so much good out there, and normally I am not one to get sucked into the negative things but I felt like last night it was all thrown in my face at once! I couldn't help but cry that my sweet innocent boys will grow up in this sickness! I was crying and telling Matthew I am ready for Jesus to come back and take us to our safe home where no one will be sick. No little girl or boy will be beat/abused/molested/sold in sex trafficking like they are worthless/ no cancer or sickness! I just can't wait! I know all these things we can not dwell on because God does not want us setting around scared all the time for our life but I think it is important to be aware that there is bad stuff out there because as Matthew tells me...When we let our guard down that is when bad things happen! Our job as parents is to protect our children and to trust that God will give us the wisdom and guidance on how to do the best we can!  So after crying and venting and praying I finally decided I am going to start trying to find a good article and posting it instead of negative junk! I find it amazing that good news does not spread like bad news! I saw a thing where Sylvester Stalone accepted Christ as his Savior and was very open about it but did we see that on the news???? NO... but if he would have done something crazy at a bar or got taken to jail it would have been everywhere!!! ....hhhhmmmmm...something to think about! Seems a little backwards to me!
ok ill get off that soapbox!! This week really has been a good one! Jagger LOVES preschool! I am so happy that he enjoys it. That is a true answered prayer from God! We have had problems with anxiety with him and I really did not want him to be miserable there but he does love it!! He is going to be playing soccer and this week was the first practice....Before practice he was asking Matthew if there would be a person to guard the goal. When Matthew told him No, he looked at his daddy and straight faced said, "Well I don't want to play then!". This boy knows what he wants... He is such a sweet boy! I am so proud of him!
Hudson is doing great too! We had therapy this week and they were super proud of his progress! Its funny because I know he is doing good and progressing but I see him everyday. I love when the therapist comes in and can see big steps he has done! He got to start eating cereal this week. So far he is still trying to figure it out but I think he is enjoying it! They told us if to give him a week on it for 1 time a day then we can go up to 2 times then if he does good with that we can start a green veggie!! Woohooo.... I can't believe its time for that! It seems unreal to me that this year is more than half over! I have already had my mind going to Christmas several times and then I have to say stop Megan...we have several "other" Holiday we need to enjoy first!
Hope everyone has a blessed day!!
Lots of love

Learned My Lesson!!

So today was a first and last experience for me! I got brave and took both the boys to Jonesboro by myself!!! What was I thinking? In my head it sounded ok! Hudson normally does really well because he will just sit in the stroller! I really was praying about Jagger. He is NOTa shopper and it normally stresses me out when I take him! I am not sure when this happened because he use to be awesome! I am thinking its because I don't have a double stroller and he has to walk! He use to sit in the stroller and play Ipad or watch movies! He cant do that now so I think it messed our whole experience up!! Today was one of those HAVE to go things!! It couldn't wait and it was the only day to go! This morning I walked out the door saying " I got this!!" "Jesus is with me!". The ride down was good! The first stop was Academy Sports! I had my list and we were there get only the list! I was not even gonna look at anything.....well i forgot I had 4 year old eyes with me!!  Instantly... Momma, can I have this! Momma I want that!! And on and on!! It was about to drive me insane! I think I spent more time saying no lets go than it took me getting what we went there to get! We get to the car and by this time Hudson is crying! Booo... Not what I am wanting!! We were already in the car and pulling out so I thought he can wait a few minutes until the next stop! So in between Hudson's crying even louder and Jagger yelling over him, I am trying to focus on the road and say a small prayer! We get to LifeWay and I get Hudson out! Jagger starts complaining he doesn't want to go in LifeWay because I always take way tooo long in here!! This makes me smile and I tell him that is not a bad thing! LifeWay takes all of 5 minutes but of course Jagger is begging for candy! The sweet girl was trying to explaining something to me and I seriously didn't hear one word she said because my attention was on my fussy baby and my 4 year old begging for chocolate!  

The next stop is the mall!! Blah! I know people were laughing at me because I was literally speed walking down the mall dragging jagger along! Poor guy. I refused to spend more time in that mall than necessary! I was determined to do what was needed and get out! We finished the mall and headed to Target! This is where the issue started! I had Hudson in the stroller, and I knew I needed a cart but how was I gonna do both so I decided to stick with stroller. We were putting all the stuff in the bottom and if you know strollers you know the bottom does not hold much! Well within 10 minutes the poor basket was sagging. We were almost to the the toy isle( i had promised Jagger a game) and it hit me. I needed to use the bathroom! I had been holding it since Academy Sports! And there was no waiting! We were literally running to the bathroom. Jagger is crying because we skipped the toys and now he wont get one!  I know people are really staring now! We get to the bathroom and I realize we cant take anything in because my stroller is full of unpaid merchandise!!! Ggggeeezzzz! I have to take the car seat out and get us all in the bathroom while trying to tell Jagger if he doesn't stop he wont get a toy! Thankfully at this point Hudson is laughing at Jagger! We finally get out of the bathroom, get Jagger a toy and then it dawns on me one of the things I specifically came for is in a big box!!! I didn't even blink an eye..I am so ready to get gone Ill do anything! I grab the box and carry it under one arm while the other arm pushes the stroller ,all while telling Jagger to hurry up!!! We pay and by the time I get to the car I am almost in tears!! I couldn't even remember what we bought! It was craziness and it is something I don't want to experience again!! I get everything loaded, kids in seat and we head to Chic-fil-a for some food! Hudson starts crying because its nap time!! I just ordered the food, and headed out! He cried until we got out of city limits! I thought on the way home I would have some quite time but wrong again! Jagger talked the whole way, which was fine! We had some good one on one conversation! He is so sweet and I love him so much but God did not give me boys that like to shop! From now on I will be going alone!!! :) 

Hope everyone has a blessed night!  

Lots of love

New Chapters!

This week has been a big week in our home!  Our sweet Jagger Preslee started preschool! Preschool is different here than where I am from! It is associated with the public school! There is a morning class and afternoon class! It is also everyday of the week! Well as you know, I am a stay at home mom so Jagger has never really had to be anywhere every single day! I have really been nervous about this because since I have stayed at home....well lets just say we had our own "schedule"! Do whatever whenever! 

Let me tell you a little about this child.... He has NEVER taken naps!! Ever!!! He will flat tell you that sleeping is boring!! About a year and half ago we tried to send him to a daycare so he could start getting use to being around other kids and being away from me!! Once he found out there was naps he was D.O.N.E.   he was having no part of that!! He was miserable! I was miserable! It was awful. So needless to say we decided to not go anymore!

 He has never gotten up early!! As my dad would say he likes to burn the midnight oil! There have been Matthew and I will fall asleep on the couch/recliner and little ol Jagger is still watching TV!  And this is no ones fault but our own!! 

I have always taken Jagger everywhere with me! I have never let having a small child stop me from doing anything! He has always gone a lot with me! So this whole school thing/schedule thing is a new exciting world for us!!

Matthew and I have been dreading the day that he started school! We have felt that is when our sweet innocent baby will come home corrupted and part of the ugly world!! I sound crazy don't I?? I hate our babies growing up! It makes my heart hurt! So anyway the weekend came and went and here we were Sunday night preparing for school!! We got backpack set out, clothes set out, bath, teeth brushed, and jammies on. We got in bed and said our night time prayer then read The Kissing Hand! During the middle of the book, I look over because I hear something and its my husband crying!! My heart broke! I was actually worried something else was wrong but played it off so Jagger wouldn't notice! Once Jagger got to sleep I knew from Matthews face he was heartbroken because reality is setting in that baby boy is growing up, and plus if you have ever read The Kissing Hand you know it will send you over the edge and you cant stop crying!!! 

The next morning was crazy! I woke Jagger up at 6:40 because this child is not a morning person! It takes him a good hour to wake up and not be a bear. Plus he likes to lay on the couch, drink apple juice and watch a cartoon before doing anything. So i thought if I moved him to the couch at 6:40 he would have plenty if time to get his bearings straight before we left!!! Around 7:15 we started getting ready because of course we have to take our first day of school picture! And thanks to Pinterest a normal picture in front of the door is not good enough! We have to have chalk boards and all the other stuff! I sometimes think Pinterest has made lifea little   more complicated at times! :) we also had cute Pig cookies to take to school for snack!! Thank you GiGi for making them! Matthew and I both went to take him! We did really well until we started walking away and thats when I broke down! It finally hit me he was staying at school all alone and guess what??? He was happy!! Smiling and everything!! This is not right!! He is suppose to be crying and wanting to stay with me??? 

The time he was at school flew by and I was so excited to pick him up! He was grinning from ear to ear! He hopped in the car and told me all about it! Said he was ready to go back the next day!! 

The best part was he was in bed asleep by 8:30!! That is seriously a world record in our house!! I am thinking this preschool thing is going to be great!!

I also know that even though we have been sad about him growing up, its in God's plan! I know there is nothing I can do! All I can do is lean on God for comfort and trust that he is protecting my baby in this new chapter of his life! 

Hudson update- Smiles all the time! Loves to to sit up and stand up with our help of course! LOVES to laugh at his big brother! Weighs almost 12lbs! 

Please keep us in your prayers as we try our best to keep him away from all germs coming soon!  Starting in the next month VNA will start coming to our house and giving him rsv shots. We will be homebound October-mid March due to flue and rsv!! We are gonna have to work extra hard to keep him protected from germs big brother will bring home from preschool!!!

Hope everyone had a blessed first week of school!!! 

Lots of Love 

Finally!!

It has been awhile since I got to sit down and blog! Well I am finally getting the chance and I am sitting in the kitchen floor waiting on Jagger's pizza to cook! And I have to tell you my son would eat pizza for breakfast, lunch and dinner! We get creative with how we make them! Today it is on a flour tortilla!!! Hey whatever works huh??

Ok so you would think that since I havent blogged in so long I would be so insanely busy, but I look back and I haven't. My days are just non stop Hudson and Jagger! I am not complaining one single bit because Monday my sweet Jagger will start preschool! He will be going everyday 8-11. Our preschool here is part of the public school but its half day. You either go morning or after lunch! We are morning!!! This cracks me up because for 4 years now Jagger has never been a morning person! I think he is in for a rude awakening! :) i am looking forward to finally getting him on some sort of schedule!

I am trying to think what we have been up to! We did go to Mom and Dad's for a few days, which was awesome!! It was Hudson's first time to be at their house! Jagger was excited to show him around. I was alittle nervous how he would do about sleeping in a different place but he did great!!

 We have had several birthday parties we have been to! I hosted a baby shower here at the house. I got hooked on a silly tv show on Netflix that consumed my life for several days! I have helped a dear friend in her classroom at school. So really not much exciting!!

Well time to get off here and get little one down for his nap!!! 

Hope everyone has a blessed day! 

Lots of Love

hudson ready for allysons party!

At moms visiting

7 Months!

Hudson, I can't believe it but as of yesterday you were 7 months old! The time is flying by! It seems like yesterday we were in St. Mary's hospital wondering how we were going to make it through all this and here we are! God is good! 

So here is a little about you this month!!!

Weight as of the 25th (St. Louis dr appointment)- 10lb 9 ounces!!! Wooohoooo  the doctors said you have finally made it on the growth curve! 

Clothes size- 0-3 or some 3 months! You officially do not fit in newborn clothes anymore! I cant believe I am having to go through and get rid!   Diapers: size 1

Eating: bottle (breastmilk mixed with formula) taking between 3.5 to 4 ounces! You are eating around every 4 hours now! And then at night sometimes you go around 5!! Mommy is happy about this! 

You are such a happy baby! You love everyone and will smile at anyone! You especially love your brother!! You always look for him! You have not officially laughed completely out loud! You have a sort of laugh but its not a full giggle like we are waiting for! 

You have found your feet and you cant figure out what they are! We love to watch you look at them! You have started chewing on everything and you can put your whole fist in your mouth!!! I am wondering if you are working on a tooth!!! 

You are in physical therapy and you do not like tummy time! The therapists will start coming out once a week to work with you!!

You have been sick for the first time since we have been home! This makes me very nervous but I know its going to happen. The doctors checked you over and couldn't find anything so they are thinking a small summer cold! You never ran fever or anything just a yucky cough!!

Mommy can't believe how much progress you are making! I am so proud of you and can't wait to see what the next month holds!!!

Hope everyone has a blessed day!!! 

Lots of Love! 

Some People!!

Some people will never change!!! It doesn't matter what you do or how you treat them they will never change! Over the last several years there are a few people that I have spent too much time trying to get them to like me or accept me and I have learned its not going to happen! This is one of my major faults. I care too much what people think! The only person that should matter is God. I tell myself this all the time but then it never fails they end up making me cry or cause me to feel not good enough! I realize I don't come from a lot of money or have a lot of money. I realize I don't use proper grammar all the time. I realize I make my kids mind me and do believe in getting on to them!I realize I didn't go to college and finish the right way or wasn't part of a sorority! But all things aside I can honestly say that I feel I am a good person! I LOVE people! I Love to make people smile! I want to help you in any way I can! I can listen when you are down and most importantly I can pray for you! I won't judge you because you aren't always wearing name brand clothes or you don't have your hair fixed! I love to laugh and have a good time and don't require fancy things! I promise if you could ever get past your issues with me and give me a chance you might be pleasantly surprised! But if that doesn't happen then I know it will be ok! I guess in life you can't make everyone like you!!!

I never dreamed I would let these people get to me so bad but I have. I am human. I don't like being hurt and bottom line is we all want to feel accepted! We want to be loved and treated with respect! 

I have had many talks with God and begged him to help me not care about them or what they do but guess what I can't. It is ingrained into who I am to care about people. God truly wants me to care for them even when they don't for me! And its amazing as I sit here and write this I am thinking this is what Jesus would do! He cares even for the people who don't like him!

I am sorry I have gotten off on this soapbox today but it has been on my heart and I needed a way to "release" it!!! This is something I have been dealing with for several years and I know with God I can work through it! So bear with me and I promise I will quit whining about this! 

Update on my kiddos- jagger got sick on Friday and we had to take him to Urgent care! We were very upset because first you hate when your babies are sick and second, we can not let Hudson get sick!! Jagger was and has been running high fever and all kinds of other stuff! Doctor gave us meds and sent us home! We tried our best to keep them separated. Well yesterday Hudson started showing signs of not feeling well! Coughing, not eating, really fussy.... Instantly my heart sank! I know the day will come when he will get sick but I want it to be awhile from now! I called the hospital and doctors and they told us what to watch for. So in between the no sleep because you have to rotate tylenol  and motrin every 2 hours and cleaning  up throw up, to holding the baby all night because he started crying when I laid him down we finally made it to the doctor today and they are treating Hudson for allergies!!! Wooohooo! I can handle this! They ran every test and xray but couldn't find anything! They probably thought I am nuts but better safe than sorry! We have been through too much and I am not taking any chances! Hopefully we can all get some rest tonight!!!!!

Hope everyone had a blessed day! 

Lots of love! 

Where Do You See Yourself!

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?? This is a question I remember thinking about many times in high school and I honestly can't believe in May I have been out of high school 10 years! Over the last few months I have looked back on my life to see if its close to what I thought it would be! Some things are and some things are completely different! 

I always wanted to be married to man who grew up in small town! I wanted to be apart of a small town and have my kids grow up in that small town! Check.. that happened! Now I am not going to lie, this town was very hard for me to move into! The first year I cried all the time! I did not feel accepted and really didn't have anywhere to turn except to my mom who lived 3 hours away!! But its amazing how now 5 years later I truly feel this home! I feel this is where God wants us. At least for now!!!

I love my family but grew up with a small one. Just me, mom, dad and my grandma. I always wanted my husbands family to be big and close knit. I wanted my husband to have siblings that I would become best friends with and a mother in law who I was just as close with! Matthew does have a big family and I feel blessed to be part of it!  

Now 10 years ago I did not think that I would be married with kids this soon, but obviously God had other plans for me!! I always saw myself getting through college and having a great job, then getting married and having kids! Wrong....did go to college but not the way I thought... My fancy job= stay at home mom! I NEVER dreamed or thought I would be a stay at home mom!! I really didn't even have that desire. Now...I wouldn't have it any other way! 

I always saw myself involved in church. I never dreamed I would Love a church and church family as much as I do ours! I have really been blessed with Matthew's church! The people in the church are awesome and I always look forward to seeing everyone! I have made some very special relationships being a part of this church! I cant imagine life without it! 

Matthew and I were just talking the other day about 10 years ago, did he think he would be married, have 2 boys and one of them have to spend over 4 months in a hospital! No!!! We never think that! Most of the time what we think we want and where we see ourself is not what God has in mind!! 

So where do I see myself in 10 years??? I really have no idea! Hopefully still being the best stay at home mom I can be! Hopefully watching my boys play sports, attending school functions and teaching them to be awesome followers of Christ! I honestly have no idea what or where we will be in 10 years! Heck for all I know we may be in Heaven with Jesus! But whatever he has in store for us I know it will be awesome and I am going to enjoy every second of it even if its not what I had in mind for myself! 

Hope everyone has a blessed day!!