Monday, April 8, 2019

Hardest Job Ever

Parenting...Something that almost everyone wants or dreams about doing, but do we ever really stop and think about all that comes along with it? I know I didn't. All I ever thought about was rocking the baby, reading books, playing, buying cute clothes to dress them in, and whatever other silly thing I had in my head.  I never once stopped and thought about all the EXTRA that comes along with being a parent! The hard part about being a parent.
The minute my boys were born my mind was flooded with questions like, "How do I teach them to be responsible humans?" "How do I protect them in this crazy world?" "How do I teach them to be respectful men in a world full of disrespectful people?" "How do I teach them right from wrong" "How do I teach them the love of Christ" and so many other things. I learned that right then anyone can birth a child and call themselves a mom, but parenting/raising a child the RIGHT way is not for the faint at heart. I knew I had my work cut out for me. I knew right then I had to make a choice right then if I wanted to take the easy way of being a parent or put on my big girl panties and raise them in a way that would take blood, sweat, tears and LOTS of prayers.
10 years later, and I am still not sure I am doing any of it right. So many days I want to throw my hands in the air. So many days I want to lay in the floor and cry. So many times I question if I am the right person for this job. So many days I want to take the easy way and just sit back and let things happen. Thank God that he continues to tell my heart to keep on. To keep being the mother he created me to be.
In saying all of this, I wanted to share some things that I think make parenting hard......

*saying no! I think this is a biggie. I think it is much harder to say no than it is to say yes! I would LOVE to say yes to everything. Believe me...but that doesn't make it right. Parents..learn to say NO. It does not hurt our kids to hear the word no. One day the world is going to tell them no, and will they be able to handle it?

*Bible study with kids! I can not tell you how many times I have wanted to throw the towel in on this one! EVERY single time, we would sit down to have family bible time something would happen.  Phones would ring, kids would say they are hungry, kids would say they are tired.... basically anything and everything until I would get so frustrated I would give up!  Finally I decided I was going to fight on this one. I figured out a time that we wouldn't get interrupted, a time when they were not hungry or tired and guess what, it works? Are we perfect with it everyday? NO! But it is something that I feel is important so I am not going to give up!

*Teaching respect, and manners.  THIS IS HARD and it takes not giving up!!! I feel like it is something that has to be a continuous thing every single day!! I literally remind my kids about their manners multiple times a day! Some days I feel like I am blue in the face.  It would be much easier for me to just drop it and HOPE that they are using them, but I know that's not enough.

*Setting rules and boundaries..
Everyone has rules and boundaries that are important to them. The hardest part is following through with them. It's so much easier to just establish the rules and then just forget about it. When we establish rules we have to make sure our kids know what the rules are and make sure that they are following them. There should also be consequences set for them. Good and Bad.  This has been hard for us as a family. So many times rules are set and one parent makes them follow the rules and the other doesn't. This makes it extremely tough.

I know there are many other things that make parenting hard, but in the end it is so rewarding!! I feel like when we put in the hard work we get to see the return. I love to hear people brag on my kids. It does make me feel like I am doing something right at times. I am so grateful that God chose me to be part of the hardest most rewarding job ever!










Hope everyone had a day full of blessings...
Lots of love.

Wednesday, April 3, 2019

Grandma

Grandma.Granny. Grandmother. Nana. Mimi. Bennie. Gigi. Whatever name is used, it is a name that brings me instant comfort! I have been extremely blessed in the Grandma area of my life. I was raised with my dad's mom aka Grandma Margie. I also had my mom's stepmom, Betty, who I called Mimi. I never got to meet my mom's mom, Emma(she passed away when my momma was 9), but I have no doubt that she has watched over me from day 1.  Since marring Matthew, I have gained even more blessing in the grandma area. Both of Matthew's grandmas have accepted me as their granddaughter, no questions asked.
Grandma Margie has always been a constant in my life. I honestly can't remember a time in my life that she wasn't there. Many of my childhood memories were made at her house. Spring breaks and summers were spent staying with her. Daddy and momma worked year round, so I would stay with her during all the breaks. We took trips to my Aunt's house in Cape. We worked in the garden. Hours were spent watching her sew or crochet. We shelled beans. We stood in the kitchen and watched her cook wonderful meals (breakfast, lunch and supper). We played in the sheets and towels that were hung out on the clothes line. Many games of hide and go seek were played. Tanya Tucker could be heard playing while we two stepped and danced around the living room.  Night times were filled with reading books, or watching a movie while she put my hair in sponge rollers. I never remember being bored at her house. There was always something to keep us busy.
During Spring break, the boys and I went and stayed at Bennie and Pops (my mom and dad..they live probably less than a football field away from Grandma). While we were there, Grandma and I reminisced on the memories we made. We looked at old pictures and talked about the good times. We also spent some precious time in the kitchen cooking our favorite meal! White beans, fried potatoes, cornbread, and slaw. As I sat in her living room, tears came to my eyes because I felt like for the first time I actually saw her as an 88 year old woman. I saw the wrinkles and age spots on her hands, the grey hair, the tiredness in her eyes, and how she has slowed down. It finally hit me hard that this woman, the woman who has always been my cheerleader, the woman who has picked me up when I am down, the woman who never saw my faults, this woman who showed me a love of the kitchen, and many other things would not be with me forever.
The love of a grandma is like nothing else in the world. It is the precious hand that wipes away your tears. Its the arms that hold you until you fall asleep. Its the purse that you know without a doubt will have gum or some kind of candy in it.
When Matthew and I got married, I was sad because I knew I wouldn't see my Grandma as much as I was use to. I had no idea that God had a woman in my mind to step in and be the Grandma that I needed, enter Grandma Betty! There are not enough words in the world to describe how wonderful this woman is. 11 years later, and I can honestly say God knew I needed Grandma Betty. We have a wonderful relationship, and she has taught me the kind of mom and grandma I want to be.
My entire life has been surrounded by wonderful women, who have helped shaped the woman that I am and the woman I am still becoming. I thank God everyday for Grandma Margie and Grandma Betty. My life would not be the same without them, and I am beyond grateful for every moment I have with him. If you are lucky enough to have a grandparent living, please do everything you can to spend as much time with them as possible. Listen to their stories. Learn their ways (special recipes, sewing, etc). Take pictures with them. Just be with them. You will never regret it!









Hope everyone has a blessed day!
Lots of love...