Saturday, April 16, 2011

The Ugly Monster - part 2!

well, I am back! I have had a fantastic day so far! I spent this morning with my mother-in-law and Jagger! We had a great time! I am blessed to have good family in my life!

So, I want to contine this talk about depression/anxiety/worry! I really want to talk about several things that I have worried about in the past!! and when I say past, I mean past! I am so happy to say that these are things that I have overcome!
1. The Second Coming/End of the World- I would sit and have severe anxiety over this!! I mean seriously, as I look back, I am thinking -look at all the time I wasted over something that is completely out of my control!!! As I have grown stronger in my faith, I have come to realize that I was scared of the un-known. I am very confident in my salvation and I know that when I die or Jesus comes to get us, I am going to a WONDERFUL place! Also, I faced my fear and did the Beth Moore Revelation study! This is a huge step for me because use to in church or even being around people talking about this, I would immediately start sweating, and get sick to my stomach! The "monster" was trying to get in! I actually went back and forth on this study- one minute I wanted to do it and then for a few days I would say "nope" I am not doing it! But God just kept telling me, "yes, you are doing this"! Oh my gosh- it was so worth it! I have a completely different outlook on this subject! I am not scared of it! I know what is coming and am excited that I will be in a better place with no worries!
2. This one is embarrassing- Gas Prices- I would get myself so worked up over gas prices!!! Yes, gas prices! It is so dumb when I think about it! I mean seriously, what is my worrying about that going to do! Just makes my situation worse! Still have to pay for the gas, why not be thankful God has given me the money to pay for it!
3. Money- I would get so worked up over money and how we were going to pay for things! I mean yes, we have control over what we spend but I had to learn to relax and know that we are ok! Just because I can't go out on a big shopping spree does not mean it's over! We have just had to learn what our priorities are and what we truly can and can't afford!
4. Natural disasters- Ok, so this one is about as dumb as gas prices! (I am glad that I am writing this because it is making me aware of how retarded it is) I mean how can I worry about this! I really have no control over this! yes, I do not want a tornado to come and blow my house down, but if it does, life will go on! I can not sit around and spend my life worrying about things that are COMPLETELY out of my control! It is what it is! You deal with things how you can and move on!
5. war, what people thought about me, illness, and many other things!!!

I did not write these two posts on depression to make people feel sorry for me! I didn't write them to put my business out there. I wrote them because I know there are so many other people out there going through the same thing, and I just want them to know they are not alone! It is amazing to me how many people are going through this on a daily basis! I am one that went through it, got help and now am enjoying life! yes, I do have days that get me down, but I know how to recognize what I am feeling and fix it quick! I have learned to keep my scriptures on worry with me! There are some days that I have to repeat Matthew 6:25 and Philippians 4:6-7 over and over just to make it through the day! God did not put me on this earth to waste it away worrying and being depressed! God put me here to enjoy it to the fullest and that I what I am learning to do!!!!!
Hope everyone is having a fantastic WINDY day!!!!

1 comment:

  1. Ok. Couple things about this. First off I want to thank you so much for posting this. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one that has worried about EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE. I too, have spent countless days and nights worrying about the weather, especially up here where blizzards can cause you to lose power for days at a time. That's the big one for me. Money is up there too.

    The thing that caused me the most stress was Steve going to Afghanistan. That was the worst roller coaster I've ever been on. At one point, I went 33 days without hearing from him at all. His company was on a mission at a village where they were catching IED's and gunfire the entire month. Several of the guys were killed there, and his partner was injured. I don't know how I made it through that, but I did.

    Another thing. When you are really truly depressed, don't be ashamed to seek help. Whether it's a psychologist or medication. Depression is not a joke. I had to be put on medication while he was gone, and honestly, it did make a difference. It couldn't make it go away, but I was able to function.

    But, no matter how bad things are, they don't stay that way forever. There is ALWAYS light at the end of the tunnel. You just have to keep your chin up and keep moving forward.